Exhale

It is the end of the winter. It is a hard ugly time of year when things are going well or at least monotonously. Right now I am consciously thinking through resources, things that nourish and support me. Gather all your supplies and lets get through this. 

I am rather glad it is Monday because this last weekend was a low time for me. On Saturday I found myself playing too many hands of solitaire on my phone and not wanting to get up and do the things that needed to be done. I guess I'm lucky that sort of thing doesn't happen more often. Luckily my husband was available for some cuddling and talking through and that helped. (We don't do as much of that as we should. Part of it is being in a very small house with a bedroom next to my 16 year old's room.) I felt relief after getting through the deep freeze without frozen pipes (our house) and with my MIL in Texas intact (her pipes did freeze but she kept her power). But part of my reaction was un-clenching after days of anxiety. And that caused some of the bottoming out. I always find it's helpful to say the emotion out loud - 'I feel sad' helps me realize it and give the feeling its due. 

I did get to walk outside both weekend days and that was a good change. Saw a bald eagle and a couple of other unidentified white birds circling above us at the wetlands. Sidewalks in our neighborhood were mostly clear yesterday with a just bit of melting slush left in spots. 

Spouse got his first vaccine dose last week. Good thing for an appliance repairer as he works in other people's houses . He said it was well managed and a quick, efficient experience at the County Fairground. I tried to sign up with the county but they lost me somehow. I have left a message and hope they can find me again. My teenager is signed up too. My mother has both doses. My MIL had her first appointment canceled and will try to get another one set up. K says she doesn't think Evanston, IL will have a dose for her before our county. It's a race! I am glad to see progress and hope the national acceleration happens to get more of us vaccinated.